50 Gets You 1: Fifty Years of Living, One Life of Purpose
Most people have difficulty accepting their dreaded decade b-days. But not me. It is my last day to be 49. Fifty will come tomorrow! And I cannot wait! But maybe not for the reasons you think.
When I tell you I am excited for tomorrow, I mean it. I told my husband that I want the earrings, the outfit, and the cake! I have no problem bringing in this monumental year because I really shouldn’t be here. The fact I made it to the big 5-0 is a miracle.
First, how I did not wind up as a statistic is beyond me. That was a true miracle of God. He is the reason I even had a chance! Statistically, girls raised without a father are more likely to be sexually active and become teen mothers (even if the father is not present due to death such as my dad) (NPR, 2018). Additionally, they are less likely to complete high school and often exhibit symptoms of behavioral disorders and/or emotional/psychological disorders (Kushner, 2023).
Now, let us add another component to the mix: emotionally unavailable remaining parent. Statistics show that children with this component often struggle emotionally and behaviorally because there is no one to show them how to navigate emotions. Furthermore, children are more likely to experience depression and other psychological disorders such as anxiety, eating disorders, and attachment issues (Annie Casey Foundation, 2021). And, they too, are more likely to drop out of school.
I would love to tell you that I struggled with none of this. Although I defied some of the statistics such as education and early motherhood, I wrestled with others like emotional starvation and attachment issues. Later in life, I endured two emotionally and mentally abusive marriages and another abusive relationship was in the works when the Holy Spirit woke me at 3:00 a.m. with clarity: I could get help or I would end up dead. I chose the healing route. And through the healing, I acknowledged all the painful events in my life and their impact. However, I also got to celebrate how much I came through! I could have struggled so much more. I recognize that while pain was pounding at my door, God placed a hedge of protection over me! This is my reason to celebrate!
This is my joy for another decade alive and, God willing, more decades to live. Today, and always, I celebrate the opportunity to walk in freedom, hope, peace, and joy. I also celebrate another year married to an amazing man and being a part of his family. I celebrate the beautiful, kind, loving framily (friends who are like family!) God has placed in my life. I celebrate another year of living out the purpose God placed on my life at sixteen to help people heal. I celebrate the chance to live and tell the next generation of His power and might to come (Pslam 78:14; Psalm 118:24, John 10:10).
References:
https://www.aecf.org/blog/adoption-statistics-2019